Thursday, August 11, 2005

What's the news across the nation?

When I get to work in the morning, I normally open up my My Yahoo page and scan the headlines. I have about 40 different news feeds on my page because - well first off I am a news junkie, and secondly because I have such varied interests. I also keep track of all the tech news since I am a geek.

When I skim the headlines I always get a first impression about what the article may contain. I'm sure it's not always what the author intended. So I decided I would share some headlines with you, and my first impressions. This may very well be an insight into how twisted my mind truly is. I'll include the links for you too, just in case you want to read the story:

Parent-trap snares recruiters
Shouldn't a parent trap snare parents?

Unhappy Owens suspended by Eagles
Shuttup and Play. And dear goddess please strike down his manager.

Clay wins decathlon gold to deny Sebrle
I thought the only thing Clay Aiken did was sing. And hide in the closet.

Hollywood star Angelina Jolie is Cambodian citizen
Good. One more psycho gone.

Street taps education secretary
Proofreader must be on vacation. Either that or there's a scandal in Philly City Hall.

US officials go to hackers' convention to recruit
All the other criminals are in government already. Guess they had to go somewhere new.

Opera Offers Web Browsing For Low-End Mobile Phones
That woman is into everything.

For IBM And Sun, Bigger Is Still Better
Size queens

Fugitive Couple Used Cab to Escape to Ohio
No wonder they were caught. They probably gave up willingly from the stench in the cab.

Defense of Marriage Coalition fined $19,811
$19,000? Oooooo that'll teach 'em!

Murder and mayhem, the perfect comedy cocktail
We all need a hobby.

Unocal swallowed by Chevron after Chinese pullout
Wasn't Jeff Stryker in that movie?

Courtney Love Reportedly Fails Drug Test
And that surprises anyone because...? You'd think she'd pass - seems to study enough.